Disconnect. Breathe. Feel Much Calmer.

One small habit that changed everything for me

My husband often says there are three of us in our relationship. Before you panic, let me reassure you - it’s not that kind of story.

The third party is my mobile phone.

I am, by my own admission, deeply attached to it. If I put it down and can’t find it: panic. If the Wi-Fi or mobile data goes on the blink: panic.
If I drop it and my apps refuse to open: full-blown existential crisis.

And yet… there was once a time when I didn’t have a mobile phone at all.

I would head out for the day with no way of contacting anyone. And no way of anyone contacting me. No WhatsApp. No texts. No location sharing. No one really knew where I was - and I had no idea where anyone else was either, unless we were actually together.

And you know what? It was fine. More than fine, actually. It was calmer. Less stressful. Simpler.

Breaking Up (Gently) with My Phone

So over the past few months, I’ve been trying something new. Instead of treating my phone like an extra limb that must remain attached at all times, I’ve started creating a little distance.

???????An hour before I go to sleep I turn off the wi-fi and mobile date on my mobile. Which means its off as I sleep and don’t turn it back on again until one hour after I’ve woken up. The Wi-Fi and mobile data are turned off for the first hour of my day, and again an hour before bed - and I keep it off while I sleep. My thinking is simple: if someone truly needs me urgently, they can call. Revolutionary stuff, I know. But the impact on my mental health has been enormous.

Mornings Without the Madness

Now, when I wake up, the first thing I do is open the windows and look up at the sky - not reach for my mobile, dive headfirst into social media and the emotional rollercoaster of the internet.

I make breakfast. I shower. I find my centre. I create a sense of calm before the day gets loud.

And the result? I’m calmer through the day too. Mostly. If my boss annoys me, I still react - but here’s the thing, not with the same level of internal screaming and simmering resentment.

Why Your Nervous System Might Be Frazzled

Grabbing my phone the second my eyes open, flitting between apps, headlines and opinions leaves me completely frazzled - especially when the world feels… well, a bit much.

And there’s a physiological reason for this. When we overstimulate ourselves first thing in the morning, we trigger the sympathetic nervous system - the fight-or-flight response - cortisol and adrenaline spike - setting ourselves up for yet another day of stress and overreaction.

It’s not a great way to start.

One Minute. Once an Hour. Game Changer.

Alongside this new habit, I’ve added a second, beautifully simple practice.

Every hour, for just 60 seconds, I focus on my breath.

It sounds easy. It isn’t. At first. My mind would much rather sprint ahead, solve imaginary problems that rarely materialise and chatter away like an over-caffeinated monkey.

But every hour, wherever I am, I pause. I put a hand on my belly and take a few slow, deep breaths. The best bit? You can do this anywhere - on a train, in a meeting, or out walking. No one will even notice.

What Changed?

The sense of calm that’s come from these two small changes has been astonishing.

I feel happier. More grounded. More creative.
I notice things again - especially in nature.

A butterfly.
A beautiful sky.
A single flower doing its thing.

I no longer bite my husband’s head off and then spend an hour apologising. And honestly? These moments feel far more important than keeping up with what politicians or celebrities are doing at any given second. There is a time and a place for the news - it just isn’t 24 hours a day, seven days a week.

So maybe, give it ago. Disconnect a little. Breathe a little more. I’m very glad I did.for ourselves day after day. It grows when we choose to try, even when we’re unsure of the outcome. Every time you take action despite self-doubt, you reinforce the belief that you’re capable.